Every child has an opinion and should be allowed to express it without fear of rejection or punishment ~ TKK
Ask yourself "What messages am I sending my child about communicating with me?"
For years, if my husband and I were having a conversation in our home, or just bantering back and forth, if either of our kids tried to interject or ask us a question, we wouldn't let them talk. We would usually stop them and say "This is an adult conversation!"
Eventually, my children began to yell and cry and carry on and become dramatic and my husband and I would get angry. Then they started to make up stories or lies to "tattle" on their friends...and my husband and I would scold them.
Then, one day, as my youngest son threw a fit in his room...I got quiet, got down on his level and just listened to him. At first he stopped yelling and asked "What are you doing!?"
"I'm just listening to you." I replied.
"Why are you listening to me?" he yelled
"Why wouldn't I listen to you Alex?"
..."Because no one ever listens to me..."
My heart was broken, but not because I was offended or hurt, but because I realized that I was raising a child who believed he was not worth listening to.
In a moment I understood why my kids were yelling and dramatic and needy and tattling and lying. Because they needed to use any or all of those things if they were going to be heard.
That day, I realized that if I was going to change the craziness that I had created in my home...I would have to start listening to my kids.
Today's Journaling: "What was my greatest accomplishment today?
"You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That's when you discover who you really are, and your place in God's family." ~! Matthew 5:19
