On December 11, 2011, my 13-year old daughter will be embarking on a journey that may forever change her life. As she steps forward and jumps off that cliff, her wings will open and she will take flight.
From afar I will be watching to see how much of my guidance she has absorbed up to this point. And from afar I will continue to do my best to guide her, letting go of the attachment of how it should all be.
My 13-year old is embarking on a journey of new discoveries, new relationships, new culture, new country, and new life style. As she chooses to make this move, a part of me just wants to hold on tight and embrace her with the strength of a mother bear, not wanting to let go of her cub. Then there’s the spiritual, wise side of me that knows I need to let her go and allow her the opportunity to create the most special relationship with her father who loves her just as much.
Tonight as I tucked her in and caressed her back, like I have done almost every night for the last thirteen years, I became deeply present to how much I am going to miss her. How much her sisters and stepdad are going to miss her, and how much her friends, grandparents, uncles, and aunts will miss her as well. We will all have our own emotions and opinions to deal with, and yet, we will come to appreciate how much she has changed our lives.
Will this move be a long one? We will have to wait and see. Someone had asked me the question, what if she decided to stay and make her life there? That’s something I will have to deal with if it comes to pass. For now, I’m just focused on making this transition graceful and somewhat easy for her and for everyone else whose lives will be deeply impacted by this change. As for me, I will probably be crying every time I hear Adele’s Someone Like You or Nikki Minaj’s Super Bass, and every time I see a soccer game, a friend of hers, when her sisters ask about her, or when I enter her room.
Life will be very different and I trust that distance will bring us closer together. Thank goodness for Skype!
